Pokémon of the Week

POKEDEX name: HERACROSS number: 214 type: singlehorn elements: Bug/Fighting height: 4'11"/1.50 m weight: 119 lb./53.55 kg evolutions: none Gold: This powerful pokémon thrusts its prized horn under the enemies' bellies then lifts and throws them. Silver: Usually docile, but if disturbed while sipping honey, it chases off the intruder with its horn.

base stats: HP:80 AT:125 DE:75 SA:40 SD:95 SP:85

now "Pokémon of the Week" since "Pokémon of the Month" takes too long.

heracross is nifty sumo-bug with decent stats and an interesting type mixture. the first thing you'll note is how easily this guy gets slaughtered by any fliers. but that's not too big a deal, what with all the ice beams, thunderbolts and rock slides floating around.

depending on the moveset, heracross can be a tank, or a kamikaze cannon. given the right circumstances, heracross can push just about anything over. and it learns the strongest bug attack in the existence of pokémon.

Moveset 1: @ scope lens earthquake megahorn hidden power (rock) return/hyper beam

smash stuff and smash them lots. megahorn is the beefy bug attack, great for polishing off disabled psychics and grass types and mad STAB. earthquake is a staple attack for any smasher and helps get rid of some fire types. hidden power (rock) to surprise those fliers on the swtich in. return (or frustration) is a nice strong attack for regular beating. or you could go with hyper beam for more oomph. attached scope lens for higher chance of critical hits.

Moveset 2: @ focus band counter endure reversal take down

this is a more specialized moveset, with counter and take down to help lower hp to add power to reversal. endure to eat up drill pecks and fire blasts also to power up reversal. let's hope you're faster than the other. focus band in case you mis-time an attack and hope you get lucky. not to be deployed until the psychic or flier or other fast pokémon are gone.

vote breloom

June 28 = federal election day! whoopee! also enrollment day for 1st and 4th years at UTSC. guess which one will take precedence? my bet is on frosh utsc enrollment. froshies are notoriously anal. even in backwater educational communities like utsc.

was herman an anal frosh? is herman ever anal about anything? how the heck can he be so laid back?

well, my friends, that's because my utmost concern at almost every hour is this: which pokemon should i substitute into my battle tower team to crack 300 wins? the record is at 250-something and that's with a one-smash-two-stall team (level 50). not too amusing. i managed to string 91 wins with breloom (spore, focus punch, leech seed, sludge bomb), wailord (water spout, fissure, double team, rest) and latios (psychic, thunderbolt, ice beam, dragonclaw) in level 100. stupid lucky heracross. maybe something with flamethrower. or a flier. latios no likey salac berry + megahorn. salamence can learn flamethrower AND aerial ace. hm... ice beam death.

but i digress.

right. elections. voting. federal voting! wha. i spelled feceral voting by mistake, seeing as how the [c] and the [d] keys are so close. an apt interpretation of the governing system if you ask me. heh. feces. i'll vote for the deep, chocolate-brown, right-wing, ex-steak turd who promises sweeping changes to national sewage systems and looks to have a bit of a hitler-stache. hm.

here's an overview of our political landscape...
the Liberal Party (or as they've been dubbed in ontario, the fiberals - nothing to do with extra wheat grain in their diet):
ah, 11 years of majority government at the federal level. it gets to your head after awhile, seeing as how i do not really recall any other party in power in all my years. granted i was about 7 during Kim Campbell's brief tenure as prime minister. (avril phaedra campbell?! i wonder if she had a sk8r b0i too.)

and indeed, during all these years i have yet to figure out what the Liberals actually stand for, what their policies are, and why they're so obsessive about quebec.

so i did some digging (click name link!!) and found their fancy domain name and website. i scanned their policy page and came to my conclusion. the name of the liberal game is to be VAGUE. and red. most of what they want to do is great, but they just never get around to doing it. who can blame them? they're people too.

the Conservative Party, formerly known as the Progressive Conservative and Canadian Alliance (formerly known as the Canadian Reform-Alliance (formerly known as the Alliance and Reform parties) Party) Parties : i keep waiting for Stephen Harpur to announce to the country that it has all been a big joke, a reality-tv stunt and that the real slim shady has always been and forever will be Preston Manning.

what started out as one of the first political parties in Canada has evolved and generally degenerated (not entirely out of age) into a motley crew of west central politians.

i was really hoping that Belinda Stronach would win the leadership.

but alas, another dream dashed
on the battlefield of Canadian politics.

the New Democratic Party: Alexa McDonough > Jack Layton.

Le Bloq Quebequois: where did Lucien Bouchard go?

why?

maybe she's born with it...

what have i done with the month of may?
slacked; stayed up like a dead baby, slept like a dead baby; bought a cow bell, but not for myself; glorious hail mary touchdowns; hockeyed, boy howdy, i hockeyed; did some finances; cheered when i found my calculus mark to be well above 50, grimaced when i found my physics mark to be well below 90, grinned when i found my astronomy mark to be well above 80, laughed when i found my algebra mark to be higher than last year's; did some acting, screwed up some acting; pianoed; watched Angel die an undeserved early death, watched the Leafs tee off undeservedly early, watched Amy kiss Ephram, watched Chloe blow up, watched Yugi defeat Marik, watched two minutes of WB superstar USA; fell in love with Amelie; finally started a blog and promptly loaded it with pokemon and toilet pictures; drove using hand signals; partied heartily with my good buddies; got shot at with fireworks; started lvl. 100 battle tower; changed my wallpaper; left my wife of two months to live a life of sin with emma watson. hey-oh.

vulcan logic

the main objective of any bathroom visit is minimizing the time spent in such a visit. the main deterant of achieving this objective is 'splash'. splash is caused by a force that displaces a fluid medium in diverse directions and it adds precious seconds to your bathroom visit time by a) splashing all over your pants, and b) splashing all over everything else. b is not that much of a problem if you have no bathroom etiquette, but a is an unfun situation that you will wish to rectify before exiting the bathroom.

splash is a function of distance, incident angle and ratio of the splash indices of the two media, water/urine and procelain. the index of splash of water/urine on water/urine is effectively one. the splash index of water porcelain is approximately zero. thus, to minimize splash, one need only strike porcelain, rather than water.

can that not be done standing? initially, yes. however, the horizontal component of the distance achieved is a decreasing function of the force of fluid pressure in the bladder. more plainly stated, is that the distance between you and the moment of incidence decreases quite quickly. to maintain the incident point (or splash point) at the strategic position of porcelain, one must move forward to decrease the distance between the initial position (d = 0) and splash point (d = f(p)) at the same rate of force/pressure decrease.

couldn't you just calculate the perfect angle to strike the water in which the subsequent splash is limited to the confines of the bowl? that angle is 0 degrees, directly above the bowl. any splashing that occurs will be directly upward with little to no lateral splashing.

therefore, the way to minimize splash is to assume a seated posture. initial release will strike the porcelain, nullifying any splash. in the latter portion of said release, when fluid pressure is near zero and the distance/force is minimal, the incident angle will be approximately zero, thus rendering further extrabowlular splashing to zero. furthermore, the seal formed by the buttocks and thighs will intercept any stray, stubborn droplets that cared to defy the laws of toilet physics.

efficiency is intelligent laziness
david dunham