This reminds me of that time Parliament put everything down to discuss whether or not Shane Doan should represent Team Canada as its captain because of his alleged remarks against the French. Or like that time no one could do anything about the economy because there was a big hissy fit about coalition governments being undemocratic.
Full disclosure: I'm not a fan of Stephen Harper's Conservatives (the political party), nor am I a fan of Roman Catholicism (the institution), so this confluence of events tickles me something fierce.
Catholics believe in transubstantiation, wherein the wafer and wine received during the Sacrament of Eucharist is transformed by the power of the Holy Spirit into the body and blood of Christ. Literally. Only baptized Roman Catholics 10 and up are to receive the host (body). Those who wish to abstain are to cross their arms across their chests, or shake their heads, or tilt their heads up, or just don't get in the line to indicate polite refusal.
Stephen Harper is of the Protestant mold, and thus has a different view of the Eucharistic ceremony. But in the eyes of Catholics, it looks like he put a piece of Jesus, their Lord and Saviour, born of the Mother of God and crucified on a cross, into his suit jacket pocket. In my opinion, their ire -- however misguided -- is hardly justified. While Harper should have known better than to catch the priest's attention to receive the wafer, the priest should have known better than to serve the host to a Protestant; they are supposed to ask recipients if they are baptized Catholics first.
Harper's spokesperson/damage-control, Dimitri Soudas, has already issued a statement: "The story today alleges he put it in his pocket and did not consume it which is false. It's totally absurd and ridiculous."
This debacle completely overshadowed the event (memorial for Romeo LeBlanc). It's more fun to blow up a pointless thing into a huge kerfuffle rather than to talk about actual problems.
8.7.09
Canadian Politics and why I love it
18.7.08
Politics: ur doin it rite
Sean Tevis for State Representative of Kansas
Can you resist the allure of references to:
all in one?
29.4.08
Facebook Poll's Closing / What's Uppening
the should-i-should-i-not-get-Facebook poll is drawing to a close, with one day left to vote. as of this writing, Yes has a commanding 7-1 lead over No. nay-sayers should get on their horses and fight the good, but pointless fight. otherwise, y'all can just look forward to stalking me by the end of the week.
---
and for those that are oddly interested in this sort of thing:
i started my internship this week at the elementary school i volunteered at last May, working with a grade 6 class, primarily to help them prepare for the upcoming EQAO testing.
today, i spent most of the day in the library coding an Excel spreadsheet to analyze the marks from a standardized reading test that was done earlier in the school year for the grade 7/8 class. it took a long time because a) i'm not a programmer; b) i've forgotten most of Excel; c) i'm way too ambitious about spreadsheets sometimes.
the analysis called for counting the number of students in each level per question by gender. i thought a handy COUNTIF function would suffice as i use it all the time for counting things in columns that fit a certain criteria. unfortunately, the AND function does not work in conjunction with COUNTIFs. after devising a crude workaround (sorting by gender and COUNTIFfing for those specific ranges) i happened upon a new function: SUMPRODUCT.
this function operates with arrays, which allows me to basically do a count with multiple criteria. here's the tutorial i found just after i printed out the poorly coded version. so i spent about half an hour editing everything with SUMPRODUCT formulas instead of COUNTIFs.
ex. =SUMPRODUCT((B2:B50="M")*(C2:C50=3))to count the number of male students who scored a Level 3 on the first part of the first question.
my other accomplishments today: the teacher i am working with discovered that her sunglasses had fallen apart while sitting in the staff room during recess. one of the 'legs' fell off. after about 2 minutes of staring at the ground looking for the screw, we gave up and conceded defeat. i looked on the table and found the screw. while she went back to class to corral the students, i set about screwing the 'leg' back on with limited tools. i checked the knife drawer for something to turn the flathead screw with -- too unwieldly. i checked my wallet for a thin card -- nothing thin and strong enough. on a whim, i went to the photocopy room and rooted around the little container of miscellaneous items (staples, clips, scrap paper) and found a box-cutting razor -- success. i am king of random problem solving.
last year, i defeated the industrial stapler which had been jammed for months and neglected. prior to grade 8 graduation, i was called upon to add a student's grad photo to the framed copy in which he had been mistakenly exempted from. this required me to emulate the name font, scan a copy of the photo, crop and adjust it to the right size, learn how to disassemble a fairly complex frame and glue it down with elementary school supplies. it's still on the wall today.
tomorrow, i will try to solve the busted three-hole puncher.
i still haven't visited my babies yet, but i've seen half a dozen of them at various times in the halls. they still recognize me =D
20.3.08
the one in which a lot of things happened and then i wrote about them
placemarker post for the time being. i will decorate it with words and so on when i has have the time. see the wonderful labels for a brief taste of things to come.
[REALLY]
i went to the Ishskwaday 08 conference last weekend at TKPC. note to self: try to avoid conferences the weekend before school starts up after a march break holiday because you will be completely thrashed for the rest of the week. there was going to be a writeup with commentary and anecdotes, but who would read that? point-form play-by-play it is!
Friday:
Saturday
17.12.05
caption challenge #1!
below is an excellent picture (excellent as defined by me).
please send in possible captions, via comment, by next saturday, december 24, 8:00pm.
we'll start off with an easy one:
JONATHAN HAYWARD/CP PHOTO
4.12.05
winter elections have no winners,
only whiners and weiners.
prior to our last federal election in 2004, i took a gander at the political platforms of our major parties (click title link). as we will soon be having another, i thought i'd take a break from essay writing and exam studying to take another gander. now i have two ganders. the liberals don't mind two ganders marrying, but the conservatives do.
the Liberal Party: fronted by the embattled Paul Martin, the federal finance minster who didn't notice 250 million dollars being funnelled into adscams in Quebec.
it's been 12 years of liberal rule and they've been an entertaining bunch. the 2004 election resulted in a minority government for the red team and this most recent term featured much hilarity in caucus.
a) Mississauga-Erindale MP, Carolyn Parrish
this outspoken minister's big mouth against both Bush and Martin led to her firing from the Liberals in november 2004. her anti-Bush sentiments, while echoing the opinions of a lot of informed and uninformed Canadians alike, were out of line. Martin's attempts to beseech more tact in regards to our southern neighbours only resulted in her pretty much telling him and the party to "go to hell." she retained her seat in Parliament as an independent and has since stepped down from politics after the government was voted down a few days ago.
b) Newmarket-Aurora MP Belinda Stronach
on the proverbial eve of a possible government overthrowing in may 2005's federal budget voting, Belinda Stronach, daughter of Magna Corporation founder Frank Stronach and York University drop-out, crossed the floor to join the Liberals, swinging the budget vote narrowly in favour of the minority government. citing irreconcilable differences with party leader Stephen Harper, his bedmate, Le Bloc Quebecois, and certain party policies, Belinda Stronach dumped the Conservative Party two years after helping form the party and a year after vying for its leadership. In doing so, she also dumped her then boyfriend Peter MacKay, deputy leader of the Conservatives. She was immediately promoted to human resources minister by Paul Martin. The Newmarket-Aurora riding is predicted to be one of the hotly contested seats this coming election. Many who voted for Belinda the first time around when she won narrowly by 689 votes are still smarting from her treachery.
like i said: hilarious.
that aside, the Liberal Party hasn't really changed. they remain the safe, and ironically conservative vote as they try to not rock any boats. embroiled in the controversy of the sponsorship scandal, Liberals would love to avoid controversies at all cost, but they just keep popping up.
internally, as a throwback from Martin's finance minister days, the Liberals like to whittle away at the country's huge debt with budget surpluses.
internationally, the Liberals are still safe and conservative, occasionally butting heads with the States on trade issues (softwood lumber, cattle), so they're goody-goody, but not very ambitious in pursuing any particular courses of action. this laissez-faire attitude has perplexed most people, most notably Bono Vox of U2 on the humanitarian front.
their 2006 campaign will probably follow the same winning formula that we've seen for so many years now, tax-cuts and happy promises that will somehow get accidentally swept under the rug. and time permitting, they will probably demonize Stephen Harper, just like the Republicans did to John F. Kerry.
the Conservative Party, formerly known as the Progressive Conservative and Canadian Alliance (formerly known as the Canadian Reform-Alliance (formerly known as the Alliance and Reform parties) Party) Parties: lead by Stephen Harper, who just can't seem to find an identity.
The Conservative Party is was the official opposition party of Canada. Harper, and by extension the whole party, plays this role to the hilt and insists on contradicting everything Liberal and red. i'll bet he hates strawberries. backseat grumblings indicate that if Harper loses this election (that he finally had the cajones to call himself), he will be ousted from party leadership.
where Harper goes, the party follows. the Conservatives have lost a lot of credibility (at least in my opinion) because of Harper's 'leadership'. he leads about as well as i can keep 4-4 time (not very well). he doesn't actually lead, per se, but rather waits for the Liberals to do something, and then tries to contradict it.
they recently offered to cut the GST to 5%. but then they proceeded to explain their math and that was much less appealing.
the New Democratic Party: Jack Layton, puppet of Olivia Chow.
when i first saw Jack Layton with his wife i immediately thought, "Oh no! Yoko Ono!" i have no empirical basis for this opinion, but i've decided to keep it because it makes me laugh. thus, i believe that Olivia Chow is the actual party leader of the NDP. since no one would vote for a woman (let alone a Chinese woman) after Kim Campbell's short-lived tenure as PM, Chow needed a white, male puppet. too bad no one voted for her in her own riding. she certainly is more strong-willed and assertive than Harper.
the NDP was suddenly thrust into the spotlight in the previous government when they held the swingvotes. the Liberals needed the NDP to vote for them on key issues which gave the NDP a substantial amount of sway - the little big man on caucus.
NDP policies are centrist and they try to be a voice for the common wo/man, rather than for the bigshot businesses like the Liberals and Conservatives. but since the businesses are bigshot no one really listens to the NDP unless they really HAVE to.
Le Bloq Quebequois: Gilles "so serious that i can't make fun of him" Duceppe.
the Bloc have followed their gameplan for many decades. hate Canada! separate!
in a vain attempt to garner votes Duceppe vowed to form a Quebec national hockey team (brodeur, luongo, theodore, lecavalier, st. louis, lemieux, gagne, briere, bergeron, briesbois, desjardins). of course IIHF only recognizes actual countries in their tournaments. at least this idea has put the Bloc on people's minds, fruitless as it may be. worth the laugh.
in any case, i stand by my previous stance:

19.5.05
Parrish the thought
when asked about her medical condition and how it might affect her ability to vote today...
“Come hell or high water, there’s no frigging way I’m going to let one ovary bring the government down.”
- Parrish, Independent MP
i thought she was referring to Stephen Harper.
1.6.04
vote breloom
June 28 = federal election day! whoopee! also enrollment day for 1st and 4th years at UTSC. guess which one will take precedence? my bet is on frosh utsc enrollment. froshies are notoriously anal. even in backwater educational communities like utsc.
was herman an anal frosh? is herman ever anal about anything? how the heck can he be so laid back?
well, my friends, that's because my utmost concern at almost every hour is this: which pokemon should i substitute into my battle tower team to crack 300 wins? the record is at 250-something and that's with a one-smash-two-stall team (level 50). not too amusing. i managed to string 91 wins with breloom (spore, focus punch, leech seed, sludge bomb), wailord (water spout, fissure, double team, rest) and latios (psychic, thunderbolt, ice beam, dragonclaw) in level 100. stupid lucky heracross. maybe something with flamethrower. or a flier. latios no likey salac berry + megahorn. salamence can learn flamethrower AND aerial ace. hm... ice beam death.
but i digress.
right. elections. voting. federal voting! wha. i spelled feceral voting by mistake, seeing as how the [c] and the [d] keys are so close. an apt interpretation of the governing system if you ask me. heh. feces. i'll vote for the deep, chocolate-brown, right-wing, ex-steak turd who promises sweeping changes to national sewage systems and looks to have a bit of a hitler-stache. hm.
here's an overview of our political landscape...
the Liberal Party (or as they've been dubbed in ontario, the fiberals - nothing to do with extra wheat grain in their diet):
ah, 11 years of majority government at the federal level. it gets to your head after awhile, seeing as how i do not really recall any other party in power in all my years. granted i was about 7 during Kim Campbell's brief tenure as prime minister. (avril phaedra campbell?! i wonder if she had a sk8r b0i too.)
and indeed, during all these years i have yet to figure out what the Liberals actually stand for, what their policies are, and why they're so obsessive about quebec.
so i did some digging (click name link!!) and found their fancy domain name and website. i scanned their policy page and came to my conclusion. the name of the liberal game is to be VAGUE. and red. most of what they want to do is great, but they just never get around to doing it. who can blame them? they're people too.
the Conservative Party, formerly known as the Progressive Conservative and Canadian Alliance (formerly known as the Canadian Reform-Alliance (formerly known as the Alliance and Reform parties) Party) Parties : i keep waiting for Stephen Harpur to announce to the country that it has all been a big joke, a reality-tv stunt and that the real slim shady has always been and forever will be Preston Manning.
what started out as one of the first political parties in Canada has evolved and generally degenerated (not entirely out of age) into a motley crew of west central politians.
i was really hoping that Belinda Stronach would win the leadership.
on the battlefield of Canadian politics.
the New Democratic Party: Alexa McDonough > Jack Layton.
Le Bloq Quebequois: where did Lucien Bouchard go?
