the Mystery of Women: Episode 1

women are a mystery. this is by design; everything is on the inside. men, who have (almost) everything on the outside, cannot even begin to comprehend the mysteries locked away in the opposite sex. in this new series, exclusive to pocketfish, i will explore the uncharted and give men everywhere (that read this blog) a fighting chance.

in this first installment of The Mystery of Women (MOW), i will reveal the answer to the question that has been burning on the minds of men since the Pyramids were first conceived: how do women make those towel turbans?

the towel turban has baffled men for many generations. a towel is a large rectangle of cloth; how can it possibly be tranformed into something so elegant as a turban for wet hair? why have we been scrubbing our heads like idiots when we could be letting them dry by turban? it must be magic.

my brothers, the towel turban is not magic. to make a towel turban, you will need the following:

• 1 towel
• 1 head

step-by-step:

1. hold ends of towel so that its length is perpendicular to you
2. bend your body so that you are facing the ground
3. drape the centre of the towel over the back of your head so that the two ends dangle on either side
4. twist the two lengths of towel together as if making a unicorn horn until there is no more slack
5. holding the two entwined ends tightly, stand upright and drape the 'horn' over the top of your head
6. tuck the ends under the portion of the towel covering the back of your head
7. show your wife, girlfriend, sister and/or mother and gloat

so there you have it, an age-old mystery solved. how impressed will your lady friend be when you offer to wash her hair and then wrap her lucious locks in a towel turban for drying?