Pardon my language, but I'm a happy camper!

"I want to have a baby."
"Excuse me?"
"I want to have a baby."
"Yeah, I heard the first time, but you're standing in front of the game."
She plopped down on the couch and threw her legs over the arm, leaning back against him, draping his arm about her shoulders like some dead animal.
"So what do you think?"
"They've got line one out, but we have last change, so we'll probably match the checking line against them."
"About the baby!"
"Oh, yeah. Sure. Knock yourself out."
She sighed, conceding defeat. So this is why the birth rate is so low - hockey before procreation. Perhaps I can ply him with food and drink? she thought. She eyed the chips all over the coffee table, floating, sogging in spilled cola. He looked well plied already.
"What are you thinking?"
"I already told you, I want a baby."
"Boy or girl?"
"Girl, of course."
He winced.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"No, tell me. What's wrong with girls?"
"Nothing, nothing at all. Girls are great for the first 9 years."
"Oh? Then what?"
"Uh... Then the estro- oh, hey, commercial's over."
She was starting to get annoyed. No, she should be fully annoyed by now. Can't fault him really, he is in the middle of a hockey game. But this is important! Clock's a tickin'. She didn't feel like a spring chicken anymore. Come to think of it, she never has.

---

"Sanderson is coming up the left wing now. Dumps it in deep. Vochenkov picks it up behind the net, centering pa-"
"I want to have a baby."
"Excuse me?" He gestured towards the television set, neck craning to see around her.
"-and the low slapper hits a leg in front-"
"I want to have a baby."
"Yeah, I heard the first time, but you're standing in front of the game."
"-puck's loose in the blue ice! Darington pounces on it for the whistle."
"So what do you think?"
"They've got line one out, but we have last change, so we'll probably match the checking line against them."
"About the baby!"
"Oh, yeah. Sure. Knock yourself out."
"Rolfsson wins the draw- there goes the whistle."
"Now, what a way to kill a scoring chance."
"Too many men on the ice."
"Sloppy line changes lead to foul ups."
"Yep, here they are, one - two - three - four - five - six, and the goalie is still in the net."
"You're watching Hockey Night in Canada on CBC."

"What are you thinking?"
"I already told you, I want a baby."
"Boy or girl?"
"Girl, of course."
He winced. Make-up - 10 o'clock curfew arguments - $300 prom dresses - boys - yikes. He remembered what it was like to be a boy. Boys are bad. Boys caused the dads of girls to worry. No thank you.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"No, tell me. What's wrong with girls?"
"Nothing, nothing at all. Girls are great for the first 9 years."
"Oh? Then what?"
"Uh... Then the estro- oh, hey, commercial's over." Phew. Note to self, honesty clearly not the best policy.
"Face off to the left of the goalie. Stevens wins the draw."
Boy, I hope she wants to try to make a baby tonight.