pocketfish parenting - 1: the potty

i'm quite sure my readership is not at the parenting stage (yet/anytime soon) but it doesn't hurt to prepare. presenting, on a bit of a lark, pocketfish parenting: ideas i have or encounter that i will try to remember for the future.

Parent Hacks posted something on using Ping-Pong balls as a potty training prop back in october and i thought i'd share.

of course, commentors were quick to point out that ping-pong balls are not as fun to fish out once they've been doused. the physics major (that is still) in me would also like to point out the splash factor involved with spraying a spherical object. mess minimization is key, so really, ping-pong ball sits in the half-good idea pile.

my top three props:

1. ice cube: floats and melts, and if you suck and hit the hole, it will splash back. fun for the whole family.
2. paper "boat": tap into those innate violent male predilections for destruction and tell your boy to sink that battle ship.
3. cheerios: the one with the hole that doesn't splash back. flushable, and feeds the goldfish in the sewers.

i don't remember ever getting such things to play with as a kid but i will definitely go play now.

2:00 am

is when my writing turns to cheese. 3:00 is when it turns to yogurt.

i am sitting here trying to finish this last essay (i'm on the conclusion), but i already know the whole thing is a write off. the one i finished yesterday was of equal (lack of) quality, but longer.

i don't like being pressed for time when writing. i don't like writing about things that barely interest me. but i still like writing, and in order to improve on it, i have to suck it up and take english courses so that i can learn to think and communicate coherently. it's not about the marks. so i tell myself.

i take it as a sign of improvement that i can recognize my own fecal matter for what it is when i read it because it means i can also recognize when i drop a log of gold.

i am definitely not proud of myself now, but i am definitely not going to waste time and energy beating myself up over it either. i think i relish my own ambivalence.

i have writer's block. i've had it for three weeks. what i've handed in, and what i will hand in are all essentially the same topic but with different citations and sources and for different courses. if anything, i am being economical.

it's not real writer's block, or else i would not have written here. this is literary pacing. my thoughts are being published unfiltered. i think pretty grammatically correctly, no?

in conclusion, i really dislike saying that. i dislike writing conclusions in general because i am not a very conclusive person. there is a giant paper mache piggy bank that sits unwinged, unpainted and unfinished to testify to this. all my previous english teachers noted that my conclusions could stand for improvement, but they've never actually explained how to do so. come to think of it, did i ever learn anything in english other than the jargon of literary criticism? there were no lessons on how to write better, how to overcome blockages, how to conclude essays, how to formulate theses... at least not in high school. all we did was read and talk about it. and then write about it. then wince at the mark.

when writing an assignment, i've always done so with an ulterior motive: entertainment. i try to entertain the teacher reading my paper. i let myself play with the words, with the tropes, with the concepts. not very good at it though. i alliterate like an anglo-saxon. these essays are not entertaining. they are likely to sound highly uneducated and a bit raving. my suffering becomes their suffering. reading bad writing causes a visceral pain.

i've gone and blogged for twenty minutes when i could have finished that last essay.

Do You Realize?

do you realize
that you have the most beautiful face?
do you realize
we're floating in space?
do you realize
that happiness makes you cry?

do you realize
that everyone
you know
someday
will die?

and instead of saying all of your goodbyes
let them know you realize
that life goes fast
it's hard to make the good things last
you realize the sun doesn't go down
it's just an illusion caused
by the world spinning 'round

do you realize

do you realize
that everyone
you know
someday
will die?

and instead of saying all of your goodbyes
let them know you realize
that life goes fast
it's hard to make the good things last
you realize the sun doesn't go down
it's just an illusion caused
by the world spinning 'round

do you realize
that you have the most beautiful face?
do you realize?

original version: The Flaming Lips - Do You Realize? (4.08 MB)
remixed version: The Postal Service - Do You Realize? (5.55 MB)

ripening

i figured out why 11 year old girls kept having crushes on me a couple of years ago: i had the apparent maturity of a very cool 15 year old. now i am a very awkward 17.

i wish i were this nerdy

this guy has a workroom with three walls covered in storage bins of LEGO. what is worth noting is that this guy has a wife =D there is hope!